Oy, this is gonna be a long one...Well, war crimes are despicable, anything on an Internet forum might be a level or two below that. I told him in a private message to not post his entire stream of consciousness on the forum.
Like when I was mixed up in the rumors situation, you sent me this:
"You're missing at least a few years of context here, if not at least a decade."
Great. When I wanted some context? No response. Multiple times. Very helpful. You showed off that you know the situation more than me without any interest in actually filling me in.
Your message to Grant took the same attitude. You know more than him, you're smarter than him, so he should listen to you. Nothing encouraging, nothing happy that he's been taking a significant amount of time out of his life to contribute to this forum that you've been curating for years.
That doesn't work with everyone, Nick.
And I have several friends on my messenger list that I get along well with because we all have felt outcast by the leader of the most active MSP-related board, filled with the most professionals and career connections. The admin of the group, the person most connected to the city, tells you "Stop it."
I know in your head this is just you giving advice, trying to curate a community, but you do realize you hurt and frustrate people and make them wonder why they're even involved? Including me multiple times? I can't say that for any other moderator on this forum, or SSC.
Yeah, SSC has light moderation. That's what attracts people to there, because there's not a moderator that tells them they're doing it wrong. Of course a bad side comes with that.
And I know with Grant you were not willing to talk more to him. Or help him get involved. It was just a "I'm smarter than you, so listen to me because I'm right." I'm sure that wasn't what you were intending, but it's how it's interpreted.
And your posts here reflect that same attitude. You're above everyone else because you're not caught up in the frenzy. Or you're smarter. Or have more important things going on than "the internet." You call this "the internet" as if nobody should be bothering with anything here, when really "the internet" is the core of this urban dev community. It's important.
And I think that's a big part what's driven this stupid-ass separation in community between SSC and Urban. No other urban community I've been a part of has been like this, none.
And I really don't know you, like I said, I have no hard feelings. I try to avoid mentioning it head-on because, screw it, I have no interest in fighting anyone or telling them they're doing their job wrong. But every person I know that avoids this website cites "Nick" as a big reason. Every single one that I have talked to, without exaggeration.
I get it, you "cultivate" this community by pushing away the people who rub you the wrong away.
You're one person on this board, sure, but you're a leader of it. When you tell people to shut up, understand that it's taken much differently than if another casual member says it.
end rant.
EDIT
Wow my messages blew up. Here's to show that I'm not the only one with this thought, and hopefully it can help us all understand.
"100% agree with your take on why people don't post on Urban as much any more. That is exactly why I have limited my activity. To belittle other posters because their view is slightly different is just childish."
"Also, about Nick: I pretty much agree with what you're saying. His PM was pretty harsh and it should've been handled much better."
"Nick comes off as an arrogant prick in nearly every post of his. Funny thing is, I remember him from the old Minnescraper days when he was Grant's age. And he was the same way as Grant!"
"Wow, great post over at Urban. Needed to be said. [...] You were so calm and polite with your assessment; nice work."
"I can't figure out why Nick has such a cavalier attitude towards fellow bloggers on his website. It's not a pretty picture. I think he feels it's hip, but it actually makes him look like a uber asshole"
